Tuesday, October 11, 2005

A Blog a day keeps the frustration away

I was just wondering as to why do people write blogs. I started writing it just because everyone else was writing something or the other, and because I had some three four poems I wanted to share, I made my own blog page. But I guess now that blogging has the same effect on you as does drinking. I think it gives you a kind of a high, which is good because when you become a confirmed alcoholic like I have, you stop getting a high from drinks (unless under some very, very specific circumstances).
Now, well as I told you earlier, I am working in a BPO, and as such we have night shifts here. Today is the start of my third night shift and as such I am starting out on a mission today : to write a blog everyday. Now this again is good, as because in all probability, I wont be getting a drink till Friday night, so this is all I will get.
Now well, I am happy today. I mean, kind of happy. Because after a long long long time have I been able to embark upon something which I had promised myself. And that is writing this blog. Actually the promise shall only complete itself on the Friday of this week, but it is good starting on it. 5 Blogs in 5 days. It isnt tough you see, but then I am often afraid of the easy things. Well, you see, I am this (2 hands open wide) bad at fulfilling commitments. I promise a lot to a lot of people, and in the end, end up making a complete fool of myself. You see, I have this side in me which just cant say no to people. So if someone comes up to me and says "Will you do this?" or even "Can you do this?", the answer is a straight forward yes. And then, most of the time, I completely forget about the task, and often stray down the road to MJ (well the places dont exactly matter, they change with time, earlier it used to be Nescafe, or before that the hostel TT Room), to well, enjoy life.
I still remember the Director's farewell to the outgoing students. (I was then supposed to be an outgoing student, but then a couple of bad things happened, and here I am, still a student. Actually, I am a student as well as working in a BPO, but thats a different, and a sad, story. Sometime later, after 6-7 rounds of whisky maybe). Now, here came to me a senior, he was in the Dual Degree, so he was passing out along with me, and told me, that I was required to go up and make a speech on the 4 years of my IIT life. It was supposed to be a thanksgiving speech. He had picked 3 others, including himself, to go and make that speech. I wasnt sure about what to say, but I was sure that words would come out automatically once I went to the dias, with the majority of IIT faculty, and my batchmates there. But then I saw the other three, who were busy rehearsing their speeches. And all my confidence was lost. I was not afraid of public speaking (or singing) when I had come to IIT, but the experience in my first year was so bad, that I had never tried either again. And there I was, on what was supposed to be one of my last days in IIT, making a "sponty" speech. And it was my best speech ever, and the one that beat the other three speeches quite convincingly, not in the language or grammar content, but in the applauds it got from the audience.
I started out as : "I am probably not the right guy to address this gathering, because I am a failure in this system. I am a five point someone. (Laughter). However I believe that what IIT has given me is not the academic fervour, but the best friends, the best faculty and the best facilties for all round development. And if I were to respend the rest of my life here, I would NOT like to change anything, but leave everything as it is, with the same friends, and the same faculty as I have got, and the same GPA (Laugter and applauds)."Later, an alumni from the 1980 batch came out to meet me, and told me he was very happy to hear me speak. I had probably summarised all of us, irrespective of the colleges we study in, wanna say when we leave that college.
I dont know why I quoted that incident. Its probably because I wanted to point out, that if you live life honestly and win friends, people will probably like you a lot more than if you are a self- obsessed "stud". This is true for any society, institution or work place alike. It is probably not all about winning. Sometimes losing can be fun as well. Well, it is frustrating to lose everytime you try, but it sure is fun. And when you start drinking, or start writing blogs, the frustration vanishes, and whon you have is a "joyful" loser. I guess I am one. There are others also I know, but more of it in the next blog. And I prmise myself, and you, that it shall be here tomorrow.

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