Sunday, October 07, 2007

Mahabharata - 2 : Ganga-Shant-anu

(Now well, as it happens, I am back after a week long mini Euro trip, but more about that later). And so is back this epic story of sex, violence, tragedy, drama and a lot more.

Now before we embark on another story of mindless sex and lust, here is some food for your grey matter to chew on.

Now after Yadu had been deposed of what he thought was his rightful throne, he set up his own empire outside India. On the other side, the descendants of Puru created and strengthened their own empire, prominent among them being Bharat, Hasti and Kuru. Bharat expanded the entire region till the shores of the Indian Ocean. Bharat is also famous as the king who announced an able son of a general as his heir and not his own sons, breaking the general custom of the time. Meanwhile Hasti founded the city of Hastinapur, which became the new capital, and Kuru founded Kurukshetra, one of the holiest lands in India. The story of Mahabharat proper starts from Shantanu, another king of the Puru dynasty, and great-grandfather of Pandavas and Kauravas (the name Kauravas, too, came from Kuru). Other clans of Pauravas soon evolved, prominent among them the Panchalas, and the Magadhas, where Jarasandha ruled supreme during the Mahabharat.

Yadu on the other hand, also started his own lineage (the Yadavas), with descendants like Sashibindu, who annexed much of the Indian land from the Pauravas (descendants of Puru). The Yadavs split into many clans as well, with the Andhak clan ruling over present day Mathura, and at the time of the Mahabharat, ruled by Ugrasen, the maternal grandfather of Krishna, the so-called hero of Mahabharat. Other clans of Yadavas included the Chedi kings.

There were twenty six generations between Yayati and Kauravas, Pandavas and Krishna. All this while, there was internal conflict within the Pauravas and Yadavas clans, and notable bad blood between the Yadavas and the Pauravas.

And from here, we start off the sex part of Mahabharat with the story of Shantanu.

Shantanu was the king of Hastinapur, who like many other of his ancestors, liked hunting alone. (This was a pretext to meet young virgin maidens along the way, and have a good time. He had so far managed to take more maidens than animals this way. And while it kept his lust satisfied, the walk also did a lot of good for his health, and everything was good.) So far, therefore, the thought of getting married did not even strike him.
So well, one day, as he hunted along the Ganga, he saw a beautiful maiden standing there, the most beautiful woman he had ever seen, wearing a sexy sari, which barely covered her ample breasts and exposed her cute navel. And she stood in a pose which suggested to Shantanu, "Come and take me." And Shantanu, who was not unused to maidens offering them to him, even though he looked like a loser, because he was the king, and the poor maidens wanted his favours. So well, just like that, he took her. She was yet a virgin or so he felt. It was the best sex he ever had, she seemed to know the Kamasutra inside out and he thought, "Well this is one female I can have all the time and not feel bored." And thinking this, he proposed marriage.
Shantanu: "Oh beautiful one! Who are you? I am besotted by you and your love making skills, I wanna love you till stars fall from the sky...I mean, till you or I die.. So beauty, will you marry me?" (For the uninitiated, this is where Jim Morrison got the inspiration for his Touch Me song).
Ganga: "Oh my king! I am Ganga, and I will marry you, (because you are so rich and have so much power, and I love both, she thought). However, O king, I have a condition for marriage.
Shantanu: "What is it, you know, I will fly to the moon and back for you, if you be my baby." (And this, as you all know, was what made Savage Garden famous).
Ganga: "You wont ask me any questions about my past and what I do and where I go after marriage. If you do so, I will seek divorce and leave you."
Shantanu:"I dont care who you are, where you are from, what you do as long as you love me." (Now you must have figured out, who copied it...the Backstreet Boys of course.) (Author's note: This is what a lady does to you, mellows you down from rock to boy's pop, and Shantanu was a pretty good singer.
And so like that they got married. Shantanu neglected his kingdom altogether, leaving the kingdom's working on his ministers and stayed in his room all day and all night, with his new wife (You have got to appreciate the man's stamina), stopping only when the bulge in Ganga's stomach grew large enough. Soon enough, a son was born to the king, but even before he could see the newborn, he saw Ganga, (who surprisingly, was as fit as if the child had never been concieved) throwing the baby out into the river Ganga, which caused him immense distress. But then he remembered his promise, and so decided to stay quiet, and that night, was back in his room making love to Ganga, forgetting all about the murdered baby, and having great fun for another nine months. And then again, Ganga delivered a boy, and threw it into the river Ganga. Shantanu was pained, but the pain only lasted till the night, when he was again enjoying the company of his hot wife.
And so on it continued for another five babies. All were born, and thrown into the river Ganga by his wife. All of the kingdom citizens were puzzled with the queen's behaviour, and in private, people referred to her with such terms as whore, murderer and bitch. This was not hidden from him, and he also was starting to think the same way. However, he bore it because of his promise, and the fact that after so many deliveries, Ganga's body remained as sexy and fit as before. He really loved her, and the way she made love.
And so he continued enjoying her day in and day out till their eighth son was about to be born. Shantanu had aged by now, and he wanted some heir. So when he saw his eighth son being meted the same treatment as his earlier brothers, he suddenly felt an urge to speak, "Oh cruel one! How could you do this to your own children. What kind of mother are you? You have already killed my seven children, I wont let you kill him too. "
Ganga:"You broke your promise king? Hence, I am going. The truth is, these babies of ours were Vasus, who had been cursed to take birth on earth, and I am Ganga, the river, who had promised to be their mother, and end their curse by drowning them as soon as they were born. I have already sent the other seven to their heavenly abode, but now this Vasu will have to stay back for longer time on earth. I will take him away now, and educate him from the best teachers. I will send him back to you after he is educated. Goodbye, my lover." And as it used to happen in those days, she disappeared out of side along with her son.
Shantanu: "Please dont go...Please dont go" (No Mercy said thanks).
But Ganga had left by then, and Shantanu was all alone.
He was very sad and distressed. He had no wife, and no heir, and he had all but lost his sex drive. Now was when he took to hunting for the sheer pleasure of the outside sport. Every morning he walked and saw the river Ganga, hoping she would spring to life, and he went away disappointed.
And then one day, strolling on the banks of the river, he met Gangeya.


anonymous coward said...

waiting for part 3, where Shantanu says abhi to main jawaan hun ...

tarun said...

wtf....y did u leave it incomplete....i still havent understood when will mahabharat start...

menongitis said...

Confucius say: man talking most abt sex not getting any

zubin said...

(Akshat) Or rather 18 till I die.
(Pangti) Sabar ka fall meetha.
(Menon) Confucius say: Man who talk about Man talking abt sex is gay.

Shreyas said...

boy i cant wait to read the rest of the story, please finish it no matter how many posts it takes...i am all excited for shantanu sex drive part-2

Shantanu said...

Good one, specially liked ur comments on the incidents!

hehehe but apparently the meaning of shantanu is "the child of controlled passions" what an irony

Shantanu ;)

zubin said...

(Shreyas) You ask for it, you get it.
(Shantanu) Hehehehe...This Shantanua was also rangeela like you :P

satyawathi said...

zubin r u a human being????????????????????????????? what's wrong with u? having any problem in ur brain? or u r a psycho..... if u want treatment i'ii give u ( shock treatment) than u will be able to do correct things in ur life....... everything is nice. i think in future u will be a good writer , ur's imagination power is good but boss u r lacking somewhere ...............