Tuesday, December 01, 2009

Sex in IIT

(Wrote this piece around two years ago. Still pretty relevant though). Question: "What is sex in IITD like?"
IITD Male1 (Frustrated Stud): "One sex only - male. All others are non-males."
IITD Male2 (Frustrated Best Friend): "Non-existent. IIT girls are very seedhi-saadhi, you know"
IITD Male3 (The Geek) : "What's sex?"

The Stud: Handsome and rich chap, mostly from Delhi and adjoining areas. Always believes that beauty*intelligence = constant, and is often seen complaining about JEE being an intelligence centric examination. Tries his hands therefore at girls from adjoining female colleges, but because of the reputation that the general IITian has managed over the years (of being very weak at socializing with others, a frustrated soul who ogles at every girl passing by, is rarely good at anything else other than engineering - and the third one is purely false), has a pretty disappointing success ratio of around 2%. Its improving, thankfully, though. (There are super studs, however, who despite being IITians, have managed to dump girlfriends every second month. But more of that later). Loves watching porn and is not ashamed of it.

The Best Friend: The quintessential IITian guy. The one ogling at girls in Priya and PVR, looking at them like Adam looked at the forbidden apple. Mostly from the countless small towns of India. Middle class, who has made it through hard work. Has simple ambition, and so settles for the girl sitting next to him in class, and tells himself, "she might not be beautiful, but she is pretty smart. She will make a good wife."(They generally dont). And after countless workshops, assignment, treats and movies together, when he says, "I think I love you," the female, not a fool herself, says, "but you know, I don't think of you that way. You are my best friend", 97% of the time, and that is the end of that. The rest 3% get lucky, but sex is only for after marriage, for IIT girls are very seedhi-saadhi. However, as soon as the 4 years of IITD lives get over, the love lives also generally end, leaving the guy with alcohol and a lot of debts to counter, and the female with a new older richer lover. Loves watching porn but is ashamed to admit it.

The Geek: The smartest chap of them all. Pays attention to only books in the first year, gets great grades, catches attention of the sexiest girls (whatever that means in IITD context), who want him to teach them and in return he gets to know about what sex is like in IITD. And
going by the statements of a few of them, they find its pretty cool. Loves watching porn but publicly swears never have seen a single one.

Welcome to IIT Delhi. The place, famous, among other things for the frustrated beings ogling at PYTs in Priya and PVR Saket. People who only want sex. And who can blame them? In a good batch, the male:female ratio is 8:1, while in a typical batch, it is 20:1. And all of the females who manage to reach IIT are, in all probability, unlikely to win any awards at any of the beauty pageant. Even then, the skewed ratio makes them the queens in IITD, and the males, either their slaves or the oglers at Priya, or typically, both.

There are plenty of jhaadis (shrubs) in IIT Delhi, making it a great place for people to do it.Sex in IIT Delhi is pretty common, therefore. However, due to the reasons mentioned above, the only people doing it in IITD are usually outsiders. But, as they say, every rule has an exception, and here are three of them I know - in chronological order.

A senior of mine (a superstud, if ever there was one) dated models only. And he changed them every other month. And he was caught having sex with one of them by a security guard.- 2004
A batchmate of mine , on the other hand, climbed the roof of the house of a Prof. whose daughter was/is/will be the hottest chick in IITD, and spent the night with her.-2005
A junior of mine was caught naked with his IITian girlfriend in one of the blocks one night, doing it,by another security guard . -2006

However, such incidents are less and far few, and while the opening of a bar just outside IITD has made it easier to see IITian guys and gals hanging out drunk and obviously planning to have sex, the plans remain just that : plans. Because deep inside, IITians, (the majority of them at least), are still very conservative, and believe what their religions preach - and dont all religions preach the same when it comes to sex? - No sex before marriage! It was true when I joined, back in 2001, and it was the true when I graduated in 2006.

But times are changing, and there will surely come a time when some frustrated soul will wear a Tshirt that says:
ALCOHOL : "Making IITians having sex ever since I graduated. "


Rhythmn said...

i read this on dilliwalla..
great piece.. i am sure the IITians will be shaken out of their shells..
and u'r welcome fr the link..

zubin said...

@Rhythm: IITian will never be shaken out of whatever shells u r talking about. :D. The things mentioned here is a well accepted fact within IIT. Things are hopefully changing though.

Phoenix said...

Hehe, good post, but surely dated now, I'd imagine ;) At least some facts and ratios would have changed. But why such deep sentiment about iitd all of a sudden? What about iimc? :)

zubin said...

Haha, dont know how much of it has changed. People still refer to IITians as losers :). And "deep" sentiment. :). As for IIMC, really dont remember much about the time there - was too dazed and confused (and doped and drunk) and the time just passed!! Will probably write about it sometimes. Thanks! How you doing btw?

Instinctivecuriosity said...

See! All this coming from you! And I receive hate mail when I blog baout IIT-ians!

:/ :P

PS: So funny! How you documented the incidents in terms of years. You "do" know that this is too fucking commonplace anywhere else. (alright, dont start crtying now) :P LOL

zubin said...

@Nainy: IIT has changed now, and so I hear. Its so fucking commonplace there also :D.
And this is in obvious jest. IIT is the best place to be. No kidding. And IITians rock :D!!! And they are not losers :D

Phoenix said...

Doing good, more or less. Corporate life sucks the life out of you anyway. Ran into an IITD senior from your batch (your friend) recently, was refreshing fun to talk about "old" times. (Yes, they seem old to me as well. :) )