So finally I have done it.Finally I have seen Star Wars Episode III : Revenge of the Sith. And I loved every single moment of the movie, just like I loved every single moment of the other five. Well some parts of the Attack of The Clones were pretty boring, but even then, I liked the complete product as a whole. I had always been fascinated by the Star Wars, having heard and read so much about it in newspaper and television. But I had never expected myself to see the entire series. And today I accomplished the aim of watching all the episodes in Chronoogical order (from the first release : A New Hope to the Revenge of the Sith).
The first Star Wars movie I saw was the Phantom Menace, and I liked it immensely. I especially somehow liked the young Anakin Skywalker, and with no idea who he was or what he was going to become, he became my favourite character of the movie. I loved Obi wan Kanobi as well. Which made me look forward to the Attack of the Clones. And when I got a chance to see it, I dozed off, bored by the romance between Padme and Anakin. Infact, I saw the Star Wars then as just a science- fiction movie with great gadgets, and felt that romance could wait.But then I was so wrong.
And then I took a two year break from Star Wars, when one day this June I suddenly happened to find the Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope, on the Hostel Local Area Network (LAN). And the sweet memories of the Phantom Menace were brought back. I watched A New Hope, and the Empire Strikes Back back-to-back. I was falling in love with the entire concept. And the next day, I saw the Return of the Jedi. And I was completely hooked, to this extraordinary story witnessing the triumph of good over evil. And then I saw the Phantom Menace all over again, and could appreciate the Attack of the Clones much more this time around. And then I waited for the Revenge Of the Sith to hit the theatres, and when it did, somehow I missed it. Till today. When Anakin finally succumbed to the evil, I hardly felt any anger towards him. He was just a pawn in the circumstances, and I would probably have done what he did, had I been in his place (how I wish to be a Jedi).
The most defining scene of the movie was when Chancellor Palpatine tells Anakin : "Evil and good are relative. Anybody who has the power desires more of it, and Jedi are no different." And he was right I think. Not absolutely, but good and evil are matters of point of view. Anakin felt he did the right thing because he wanted to bring peace to the entire Empire. And we tend to believe what is taught to us. Had Hitler won the World War II, and ruled the world, probably he would be considered good by the vast majority, while Churchill would be evil. The Siths were like Jedi in every respect, except that they used their powers for their own benefit. And since when has this been considered evil by mankind. Man lives for himself, doesnt he?
Star Wars has been the greatest influence on me, and the greatest story ever told on the cinema : becuase it tells all that makes a man what he is. Anakin's struggle is one that every one of us has to face, and while most of us, like Anakin fall to the easier path, which is "evil", there are also a few who, like Luke Skywalker, Anakin's son, strive to reach the end through the more difficult path, the right path, the "good" path. I think this is why George Lucas told the story the way he did : He first wanted to show a triumph of good over evil, and then wanted to warn us about how evil can take over. And while sometimes evil seems over powering, I believe somehow somewhere the Jedis will return, and hope shall be restored. Maybe there are no Jedis, but a Luke exists in everyone of us, who shall say no to evil, and bring back the good in this world. And the world shall be a much better place to live in. If everyone thought so, we had no fighting and no war. Peace shall prevail all over. And all the people shall live as one.
Wednesday, October 12, 2005
Tuesday, October 11, 2005
Of The three L's ..Life Love and Losers...And lots of Crap
Well I had promised you in my last post that I will write about the Losers, and here is it. The story starts off two years back, actually July 2003, when we, a group of six, with nothing to do, started about this group, called the Losers Group. Now this didnt mean actually that we were a bunch of losers (we were, probably, to some extent), but we were definately not winners in the context as we defined a winner.
Now a glossary of terms used in the following text: 1) Winner : (Also called a complete man), a guy who has all of the four basic luxuries in IIT life: a mobile, a computer, a bike or a scooter, and most importantly, a girlfriend. 2) Loser : Someone who didnt have any of it at all.
So well we were the Losers, and none of us had any of the basic luxuries of IIT life. (This is all time bound you see, and believe it or not, two years ago, mobiles were definately a luxury). So what we did to ease ourselves out of the pain of not having the luxuries our batchmates enjoyed. We started to act like complete losers, spending long hours discussing this and that at the place which proclaims itself to be the heart of IITD: Nescafe.
And there was more. All of us had this fetish of wearing yellow (actually only one of us had it, and we just got caught on into it), and we started coming to the Institute wearing bright yellow clothes. Holding hands and what not. Doing skits wearing our dirty yellow uniforms. Life seemed so simple then. And it was. And friends made then are the friends forever. We care about one other more than we care about ourselves. This is the simple life.
I have lost it. The writing style. Probably the more you write the worse you become at it. I am horrible. Not having any thoughts at the moment. And they say love makes the world go around. I say it is hunger and thirst and greed. Or maybe we are programmed. Maybe life is an illusion. Is it? I end up confused again.
Surprisingly, I didnt feel any nostalgia as I took my things out of my hostel. I have shifted to a new place after around 50 months of stay in my hostel. I still havent shifted outrightly, but even then I feel, the entire hostel feeling has gone in one stroke. Is it good or bad? Cannot make out. Confusion. Maybe love can save my life from falling apart. Or maybe it is too late now.
Now a glossary of terms used in the following text: 1) Winner : (Also called a complete man), a guy who has all of the four basic luxuries in IIT life: a mobile, a computer, a bike or a scooter, and most importantly, a girlfriend. 2) Loser : Someone who didnt have any of it at all.
So well we were the Losers, and none of us had any of the basic luxuries of IIT life. (This is all time bound you see, and believe it or not, two years ago, mobiles were definately a luxury). So what we did to ease ourselves out of the pain of not having the luxuries our batchmates enjoyed. We started to act like complete losers, spending long hours discussing this and that at the place which proclaims itself to be the heart of IITD: Nescafe.
And there was more. All of us had this fetish of wearing yellow (actually only one of us had it, and we just got caught on into it), and we started coming to the Institute wearing bright yellow clothes. Holding hands and what not. Doing skits wearing our dirty yellow uniforms. Life seemed so simple then. And it was. And friends made then are the friends forever. We care about one other more than we care about ourselves. This is the simple life.
I have lost it. The writing style. Probably the more you write the worse you become at it. I am horrible. Not having any thoughts at the moment. And they say love makes the world go around. I say it is hunger and thirst and greed. Or maybe we are programmed. Maybe life is an illusion. Is it? I end up confused again.
Surprisingly, I didnt feel any nostalgia as I took my things out of my hostel. I have shifted to a new place after around 50 months of stay in my hostel. I still havent shifted outrightly, but even then I feel, the entire hostel feeling has gone in one stroke. Is it good or bad? Cannot make out. Confusion. Maybe love can save my life from falling apart. Or maybe it is too late now.
A Blog a day keeps the frustration away
I was just wondering as to why do people write blogs. I started writing it just because everyone else was writing something or the other, and because I had some three four poems I wanted to share, I made my own blog page. But I guess now that blogging has the same effect on you as does drinking. I think it gives you a kind of a high, which is good because when you become a confirmed alcoholic like I have, you stop getting a high from drinks (unless under some very, very specific circumstances).
Now, well as I told you earlier, I am working in a BPO, and as such we have night shifts here. Today is the start of my third night shift and as such I am starting out on a mission today : to write a blog everyday. Now this again is good, as because in all probability, I wont be getting a drink till Friday night, so this is all I will get.
Now well, I am happy today. I mean, kind of happy. Because after a long long long time have I been able to embark upon something which I had promised myself. And that is writing this blog. Actually the promise shall only complete itself on the Friday of this week, but it is good starting on it. 5 Blogs in 5 days. It isnt tough you see, but then I am often afraid of the easy things. Well, you see, I am this (2 hands open wide) bad at fulfilling commitments. I promise a lot to a lot of people, and in the end, end up making a complete fool of myself. You see, I have this side in me which just cant say no to people. So if someone comes up to me and says "Will you do this?" or even "Can you do this?", the answer is a straight forward yes. And then, most of the time, I completely forget about the task, and often stray down the road to MJ (well the places dont exactly matter, they change with time, earlier it used to be Nescafe, or before that the hostel TT Room), to well, enjoy life.
I still remember the Director's farewell to the outgoing students. (I was then supposed to be an outgoing student, but then a couple of bad things happened, and here I am, still a student. Actually, I am a student as well as working in a BPO, but thats a different, and a sad, story. Sometime later, after 6-7 rounds of whisky maybe). Now, here came to me a senior, he was in the Dual Degree, so he was passing out along with me, and told me, that I was required to go up and make a speech on the 4 years of my IIT life. It was supposed to be a thanksgiving speech. He had picked 3 others, including himself, to go and make that speech. I wasnt sure about what to say, but I was sure that words would come out automatically once I went to the dias, with the majority of IIT faculty, and my batchmates there. But then I saw the other three, who were busy rehearsing their speeches. And all my confidence was lost. I was not afraid of public speaking (or singing) when I had come to IIT, but the experience in my first year was so bad, that I had never tried either again. And there I was, on what was supposed to be one of my last days in IIT, making a "sponty" speech. And it was my best speech ever, and the one that beat the other three speeches quite convincingly, not in the language or grammar content, but in the applauds it got from the audience.
I started out as : "I am probably not the right guy to address this gathering, because I am a failure in this system. I am a five point someone. (Laughter). However I believe that what IIT has given me is not the academic fervour, but the best friends, the best faculty and the best facilties for all round development. And if I were to respend the rest of my life here, I would NOT like to change anything, but leave everything as it is, with the same friends, and the same faculty as I have got, and the same GPA (Laugter and applauds)."Later, an alumni from the 1980 batch came out to meet me, and told me he was very happy to hear me speak. I had probably summarised all of us, irrespective of the colleges we study in, wanna say when we leave that college.
I dont know why I quoted that incident. Its probably because I wanted to point out, that if you live life honestly and win friends, people will probably like you a lot more than if you are a self- obsessed "stud". This is true for any society, institution or work place alike. It is probably not all about winning. Sometimes losing can be fun as well. Well, it is frustrating to lose everytime you try, but it sure is fun. And when you start drinking, or start writing blogs, the frustration vanishes, and whon you have is a "joyful" loser. I guess I am one. There are others also I know, but more of it in the next blog. And I prmise myself, and you, that it shall be here tomorrow.
Now, well as I told you earlier, I am working in a BPO, and as such we have night shifts here. Today is the start of my third night shift and as such I am starting out on a mission today : to write a blog everyday. Now this again is good, as because in all probability, I wont be getting a drink till Friday night, so this is all I will get.
Now well, I am happy today. I mean, kind of happy. Because after a long long long time have I been able to embark upon something which I had promised myself. And that is writing this blog. Actually the promise shall only complete itself on the Friday of this week, but it is good starting on it. 5 Blogs in 5 days. It isnt tough you see, but then I am often afraid of the easy things. Well, you see, I am this (2 hands open wide) bad at fulfilling commitments. I promise a lot to a lot of people, and in the end, end up making a complete fool of myself. You see, I have this side in me which just cant say no to people. So if someone comes up to me and says "Will you do this?" or even "Can you do this?", the answer is a straight forward yes. And then, most of the time, I completely forget about the task, and often stray down the road to MJ (well the places dont exactly matter, they change with time, earlier it used to be Nescafe, or before that the hostel TT Room), to well, enjoy life.
I still remember the Director's farewell to the outgoing students. (I was then supposed to be an outgoing student, but then a couple of bad things happened, and here I am, still a student. Actually, I am a student as well as working in a BPO, but thats a different, and a sad, story. Sometime later, after 6-7 rounds of whisky maybe). Now, here came to me a senior, he was in the Dual Degree, so he was passing out along with me, and told me, that I was required to go up and make a speech on the 4 years of my IIT life. It was supposed to be a thanksgiving speech. He had picked 3 others, including himself, to go and make that speech. I wasnt sure about what to say, but I was sure that words would come out automatically once I went to the dias, with the majority of IIT faculty, and my batchmates there. But then I saw the other three, who were busy rehearsing their speeches. And all my confidence was lost. I was not afraid of public speaking (or singing) when I had come to IIT, but the experience in my first year was so bad, that I had never tried either again. And there I was, on what was supposed to be one of my last days in IIT, making a "sponty" speech. And it was my best speech ever, and the one that beat the other three speeches quite convincingly, not in the language or grammar content, but in the applauds it got from the audience.
I started out as : "I am probably not the right guy to address this gathering, because I am a failure in this system. I am a five point someone. (Laughter). However I believe that what IIT has given me is not the academic fervour, but the best friends, the best faculty and the best facilties for all round development. And if I were to respend the rest of my life here, I would NOT like to change anything, but leave everything as it is, with the same friends, and the same faculty as I have got, and the same GPA (Laugter and applauds)."Later, an alumni from the 1980 batch came out to meet me, and told me he was very happy to hear me speak. I had probably summarised all of us, irrespective of the colleges we study in, wanna say when we leave that college.
I dont know why I quoted that incident. Its probably because I wanted to point out, that if you live life honestly and win friends, people will probably like you a lot more than if you are a self- obsessed "stud". This is true for any society, institution or work place alike. It is probably not all about winning. Sometimes losing can be fun as well. Well, it is frustrating to lose everytime you try, but it sure is fun. And when you start drinking, or start writing blogs, the frustration vanishes, and whon you have is a "joyful" loser. I guess I am one. There are others also I know, but more of it in the next blog. And I prmise myself, and you, that it shall be here tomorrow.
Saturday, October 08, 2005
All things bright and beautiful...
Remember this hymn which formed an integral part of the school assembly? It went something like this : "All things bright and beautiful, all creatures great and small; all things wise and wonderful, the Great God made them all." I still remember it all. It goes on further "Each little flower that opens,each little bird that sings; he made their glowing colours, he made their shining wings."
I always loved this hymn as a child; however as I grew up I realised that what this told us was true, but it wasnt the complete truth. If God created the things bright and beautiful, the same God also created the dull and ugly things, If he made the good creatures, the same God also made the bad creatures. And that is why I think that maybe just maybe there is no God. Because if there were a God he would have assured that life remained beautiful, and that the world was a much better, safer place to live in.
Or is it that God has died, or slept, leaving us to the chance of te earthquakes, and Tsunamis and hurricanes. Or is it the Apocalypse, mentioned in the Bible, the judgement day, or Pralay, the death of everything, as mentioned in the Hindu Mythologies. Because if any of it is true, life is coming to an end, and the gib gnab is about to happen. Or is it?
Is there a God or not? I am not sure. I am confused..as I am about most things. Want some whisky to show me some reason in life. Life is useless. A strange Illusion perhaps. Or maybe not.Maybe my next blog should be about Life itself. Right away, after a whisky perhaps.
I always loved this hymn as a child; however as I grew up I realised that what this told us was true, but it wasnt the complete truth. If God created the things bright and beautiful, the same God also created the dull and ugly things, If he made the good creatures, the same God also made the bad creatures. And that is why I think that maybe just maybe there is no God. Because if there were a God he would have assured that life remained beautiful, and that the world was a much better, safer place to live in.
Or is it that God has died, or slept, leaving us to the chance of te earthquakes, and Tsunamis and hurricanes. Or is it the Apocalypse, mentioned in the Bible, the judgement day, or Pralay, the death of everything, as mentioned in the Hindu Mythologies. Because if any of it is true, life is coming to an end, and the gib gnab is about to happen. Or is it?
Is there a God or not? I am not sure. I am confused..as I am about most things. Want some whisky to show me some reason in life. Life is useless. A strange Illusion perhaps. Or maybe not.Maybe my next blog should be about Life itself. Right away, after a whisky perhaps.
Friday, September 16, 2005
Straight from the heart...Or Maybe not
I am presently sitting in my office. Time : 0300 hrs on 16th September 2005. And before you start getting any silly ideas in your head about me working my ass off, let me tell you that I am presently working on a night shift, which I expect is something that every person working in a BPO has to experience. Yes I work in a BPO, and like I tell everyone I meet nowadays, a BPO is not necessarily a call centre. Our company deals basically with surveys and their results. Talking about BPO's and outsourcing, I had been an active Kerry supporter (which had more to do with the fact that he was anti- Bush than anything else), and now I wonder what my future would have been had the 21 votes of Ohio shifted to Kerry. Then, I guess, I wouldn't have had got this job in the first place, and wouldn't probably be writing this piece in the first place. But Kerry lost, and rest, as they say, is history.
I was sad and upset when Kerry lost, just like I was 4 years ago when Al Gore had lost due to mal rigging in Florida. And I felt sad, for REM, for Bruce Springsteen,Leonardo Di Caprio and Ben Affleck, people who had actually come out to tell the US citizens that how bad the Bush administration, and in general, the neo cons were for the world at large. And I believed that if a few more hundred valid black voters were registered in the State of Florida, USA would by today, have had 13 years of uninterrupted Democratic government, which in turn would have assured a peaceful, less polarised world.
Now coming to the main point of writing this article, I take my leanings for Democrats as a statement of the confused state of mind that I am in. I consider myself closer in leanings to the rights than to the left. I DON'T believe in social equality, I AM a racist, I AM a supporter and a big fan of Israel, and (even though I take the opposite view just to debate the issue) I think that what happened in Gujarat was probably not too wrong. Add these things up, and what you get is as much a right leaning hardliner as you can get. But when it comes to supporting a candidate, I had much rather vote for the left-of-centre Congress than the right-of- centre BJP. Or I had very much root for Kerry against Bush.
I don't know why does this happen but it does. I sometimes think of myself as a split personality, with two faces. One is the selfish me, the jealous me, the greedy me, the proud me, the rightist leaning me, the neocon me, who believes that I am destined to rule this earth, and which leads me to behave so selfishly which the other me wouldn't even dream of. The other me is how most people see me, or rather how I want them to see me, the selfless me, the innocent me, the modest me, the liberal me, the generous me. It tells me to take it easy and get real "satisfaction" and "happiness" through unselfish acts. Money, or fame, doesn't matter to this me, and it just wants to do what I enjoy. But maybe I enjoy pissing off other people. What does the good me do then? Or maybe I am not sure. Or maybe I am just plain confused.
I don't even know the real me, and I believe that people take me for one of the two faces that they know. So its hard for me to be honest to anybody, as much as I might try. Even I don't know that what I do, why I do it, and what is the outcome. Life, rather much like shit, happens. My thoughts fluctuate between the two extremes and I am never able to control them. When the "bad" me takes over, I get hyper, and am rude to everyone around. It is only when the bad me wanes away that I am able to undo my past actions, but not everything can be undone.
I am Cain, and I am Abel; both the victim and the criminal. I have no instinct, my emotions betray me. I am always speaking the truth, and I am always lying. I am aimless, and I have the ultimate aim.
If you have read so far, I will give you a reward for your perseverance of going through such a piece of life (I probably meant shit here, but for me, its all the same). The two me aren't exactly opposite . They agree on only one thing: They both love the girl I love. But then she doesn't like me, so it is all pretty useless. And then suddenly, they fall apart again: while the good me tells me to let her go, the other wants me to keep knocking at her door, and win her over. I don't know whom to listen to. I am confused. And then there is only the ultimate truth to which I can agree whole heartedly, and the only one I can believe in : I love her.
I was sad and upset when Kerry lost, just like I was 4 years ago when Al Gore had lost due to mal rigging in Florida. And I felt sad, for REM, for Bruce Springsteen,Leonardo Di Caprio and Ben Affleck, people who had actually come out to tell the US citizens that how bad the Bush administration, and in general, the neo cons were for the world at large. And I believed that if a few more hundred valid black voters were registered in the State of Florida, USA would by today, have had 13 years of uninterrupted Democratic government, which in turn would have assured a peaceful, less polarised world.
Now coming to the main point of writing this article, I take my leanings for Democrats as a statement of the confused state of mind that I am in. I consider myself closer in leanings to the rights than to the left. I DON'T believe in social equality, I AM a racist, I AM a supporter and a big fan of Israel, and (even though I take the opposite view just to debate the issue) I think that what happened in Gujarat was probably not too wrong. Add these things up, and what you get is as much a right leaning hardliner as you can get. But when it comes to supporting a candidate, I had much rather vote for the left-of-centre Congress than the right-of- centre BJP. Or I had very much root for Kerry against Bush.
I don't know why does this happen but it does. I sometimes think of myself as a split personality, with two faces. One is the selfish me, the jealous me, the greedy me, the proud me, the rightist leaning me, the neocon me, who believes that I am destined to rule this earth, and which leads me to behave so selfishly which the other me wouldn't even dream of. The other me is how most people see me, or rather how I want them to see me, the selfless me, the innocent me, the modest me, the liberal me, the generous me. It tells me to take it easy and get real "satisfaction" and "happiness" through unselfish acts. Money, or fame, doesn't matter to this me, and it just wants to do what I enjoy. But maybe I enjoy pissing off other people. What does the good me do then? Or maybe I am not sure. Or maybe I am just plain confused.
I don't even know the real me, and I believe that people take me for one of the two faces that they know. So its hard for me to be honest to anybody, as much as I might try. Even I don't know that what I do, why I do it, and what is the outcome. Life, rather much like shit, happens. My thoughts fluctuate between the two extremes and I am never able to control them. When the "bad" me takes over, I get hyper, and am rude to everyone around. It is only when the bad me wanes away that I am able to undo my past actions, but not everything can be undone.
I am Cain, and I am Abel; both the victim and the criminal. I have no instinct, my emotions betray me. I am always speaking the truth, and I am always lying. I am aimless, and I have the ultimate aim.
If you have read so far, I will give you a reward for your perseverance of going through such a piece of life (I probably meant shit here, but for me, its all the same). The two me aren't exactly opposite . They agree on only one thing: They both love the girl I love. But then she doesn't like me, so it is all pretty useless. And then suddenly, they fall apart again: while the good me tells me to let her go, the other wants me to keep knocking at her door, and win her over. I don't know whom to listen to. I am confused. And then there is only the ultimate truth to which I can agree whole heartedly, and the only one I can believe in : I love her.
Wednesday, June 29, 2005
For my Friends
The four years I spent
at the nation's premier technological institution
Have been the best of my lives,
A fact I can state with full conviction.
It wouldnt have had been such
if I hadnt found you all
Since the first year, we have been together,
playing tennis, squash and football.
I know I have wasted these four years,
doing nothing much, and with no notable feat,
but if given a chance, these four years,
in this same way I would repeat.
We havent always had the best of times
and I have fought with most of you
but without you I swear,
I would not have managed it through.
This journey wouldnt have been fun,
if you werent there with me,
Then well, IIT would just be
a pretty boring place to be.
These years have been a learning experience
and professors were not the one who taught
U were my real teachers in here
from you guys, I really learnt a lot
You have been my pillars of strength
and to each one of you I could go
with any of my problems, and you were there
to help me and make me come out of my low.
I still get frustrated
when you dont agree with me
but now I understand
without you, how boring life would be.
It has been a pleasure knowing you all,
for all of you have taught me a thing or two,
And best of luck for your future lives,
and wishing you success in whatever you do.
at the nation's premier technological institution
Have been the best of my lives,
A fact I can state with full conviction.
It wouldnt have had been such
if I hadnt found you all
Since the first year, we have been together,
playing tennis, squash and football.
I know I have wasted these four years,
doing nothing much, and with no notable feat,
but if given a chance, these four years,
in this same way I would repeat.
We havent always had the best of times
and I have fought with most of you
but without you I swear,
I would not have managed it through.
This journey wouldnt have been fun,
if you werent there with me,
Then well, IIT would just be
a pretty boring place to be.
These years have been a learning experience
and professors were not the one who taught
U were my real teachers in here
from you guys, I really learnt a lot
You have been my pillars of strength
and to each one of you I could go
with any of my problems, and you were there
to help me and make me come out of my low.
I still get frustrated
when you dont agree with me
but now I understand
without you, how boring life would be.
It has been a pleasure knowing you all,
for all of you have taught me a thing or two,
And best of luck for your future lives,
and wishing you success in whatever you do.
Sunday, June 19, 2005
For my Brother
You have been my inspiration
and I have always looked up to you
At this important crossroad in my life,
I am seeking your advice about what to do
I have always adored and admired you
Even though I am ashamed to admit that
I have tried hard to be like you
But failed to do even that
You have been an ideal son,
and mama-papa have been proud of you
As for me, I have been the reckless one,
Today I realise, a poor second out of the two.
You mean the world to me,
and a nobler person I have never seen.
Without you to guide me,
Where I am today, I could never have been.
I have been mean and rude towards you,
but you have never turned me away.
You have given me all your things to share,
And been a constant guide, come what may.
This blog is written to impress upon you
the fact that I could never ever say,
You are the person I look up to,
and I adore you every single day.
and I have always looked up to you
At this important crossroad in my life,
I am seeking your advice about what to do
I have always adored and admired you
Even though I am ashamed to admit that
I have tried hard to be like you
But failed to do even that
You have been an ideal son,
and mama-papa have been proud of you
As for me, I have been the reckless one,
Today I realise, a poor second out of the two.
You mean the world to me,
and a nobler person I have never seen.
Without you to guide me,
Where I am today, I could never have been.
I have been mean and rude towards you,
but you have never turned me away.
You have given me all your things to share,
And been a constant guide, come what may.
This blog is written to impress upon you
the fact that I could never ever say,
You are the person I look up to,
and I adore you every single day.
For my Parents
I am often left wondering
why do u still think me to be a child
who knows not what he is doing
with friends who cherish acting wild.
I know I have made mistakes,
but I have only grown wiser,
while earlier I used to be naive and rude to people,
nowadays, I have started to try making myself nicer.
You want me to pay more attention
to my studies, and be the best I can be,
but what I really want from life,
that is what you fail to see.
My elder brother has achieved a lot,
and you want me to emulate him
but please, thats not something I want,
I want to follow my fantasies and whims.
I want to find my calling in life,
and want to do things my own way,
I believe that even though it doesnt seem so right now,
Success shall follow me some day.
I still havent decided what I really want
but I am quiet sure this is not what i want life to bring,
So pushing me down this road,
might make me do some stupid things.
I want to thank you, for being such wonderful parents,
And consider myself lucky, that to you I was born,
But I now think that I am ready to go alone,
and take on life head-on.
I believe that you have cared for me the most,
and that's why you are tensed over my decision,
That all you teachings and values will come to naught,
But believe me, and please show in me some conviction.
Yes, I want to be famous, and rich,
but I believe more important things do exist,
and also what matters most is what people think of you,
and so the following tops my wishlist.
I want to be the catcher in the rye,
to make a difference in people's life,
And when I die, may people remember me as,
"This is the guy who made others live life."
why do u still think me to be a child
who knows not what he is doing
with friends who cherish acting wild.
I know I have made mistakes,
but I have only grown wiser,
while earlier I used to be naive and rude to people,
nowadays, I have started to try making myself nicer.
You want me to pay more attention
to my studies, and be the best I can be,
but what I really want from life,
that is what you fail to see.
My elder brother has achieved a lot,
and you want me to emulate him
but please, thats not something I want,
I want to follow my fantasies and whims.
I want to find my calling in life,
and want to do things my own way,
I believe that even though it doesnt seem so right now,
Success shall follow me some day.
I still havent decided what I really want
but I am quiet sure this is not what i want life to bring,
So pushing me down this road,
might make me do some stupid things.
I want to thank you, for being such wonderful parents,
And consider myself lucky, that to you I was born,
But I now think that I am ready to go alone,
and take on life head-on.
I believe that you have cared for me the most,
and that's why you are tensed over my decision,
That all you teachings and values will come to naught,
But believe me, and please show in me some conviction.
Yes, I want to be famous, and rich,
but I believe more important things do exist,
and also what matters most is what people think of you,
and so the following tops my wishlist.
I want to be the catcher in the rye,
to make a difference in people's life,
And when I die, may people remember me as,
"This is the guy who made others live life."
Friday, June 17, 2005
Fifty days of solitude (Internship time)..
Quite unlike the famous book
This is not a fantasy but a real incident
On the training and its fifty days
I would like to add some of my own comments
Of the five hundred and eighteen or so students
Who have just completed their training
It is just a small fractionwho
managed to get PPO's with their meticulous working
To the rest, the layman may ask,
"what did you all do in your companies and labs ?"
To which the expected answer may be,
"We had a well deserved rest, and increased our flab."
Some of us well manage to say,
"Our companies didnt pay us, so we didnt have anyhope."
While others have the excuse,
"We were abroad, had to see the whole of Europe."
But for many of us,
Who are in India and earning too,
why is it that the companies
dont offer us a PPO or two?
Is it because IITians dont like to work?
Or is it, because the time is too less
"Fifty days is very little,
what shall u do here, is anybody's guess"
Are the kind of comments I had to bear
Different Questions like this I had to face
It was a new company and as it turned out
I was the first intern the company had graced
In other colleges, students do training in the final year
Some in the seventh semester and some in eighth
But IITs are different in this regard
And I thought that the other colleges had put in theirthought some weight
So I decided to write a letter
asking the T&P Deptt. to extend the days
So unlike the usual convention
IITD can also follow the other colleges ways
Then I thought a lot about the matter as to what would happen to IIT
if my ideas were taken seriously by men or two
The even semester would become(among other things)poltuless
And in the odd semester, What will become ofRendezvous?
At that very moment I knew
it would be probably much better
If I was to drop this idea
and tear apart the ill fated letter,
And then as I sat within my cubicle
I felt an unending sense of doom
There was no other I knew here
I suddnenly noticed my empty room
There and then I felt
a feeling of intense gratitude
for the T&P section had made me
suffer JUST fifty days of solitude.
This is not a fantasy but a real incident
On the training and its fifty days
I would like to add some of my own comments
Of the five hundred and eighteen or so students
Who have just completed their training
It is just a small fractionwho
managed to get PPO's with their meticulous working
To the rest, the layman may ask,
"what did you all do in your companies and labs ?"
To which the expected answer may be,
"We had a well deserved rest, and increased our flab."
Some of us well manage to say,
"Our companies didnt pay us, so we didnt have anyhope."
While others have the excuse,
"We were abroad, had to see the whole of Europe."
But for many of us,
Who are in India and earning too,
why is it that the companies
dont offer us a PPO or two?
Is it because IITians dont like to work?
Or is it, because the time is too less
"Fifty days is very little,
what shall u do here, is anybody's guess"
Are the kind of comments I had to bear
Different Questions like this I had to face
It was a new company and as it turned out
I was the first intern the company had graced
In other colleges, students do training in the final year
Some in the seventh semester and some in eighth
But IITs are different in this regard
And I thought that the other colleges had put in theirthought some weight
So I decided to write a letter
asking the T&P Deptt. to extend the days
So unlike the usual convention
IITD can also follow the other colleges ways
Then I thought a lot about the matter as to what would happen to IIT
if my ideas were taken seriously by men or two
The even semester would become(among other things)poltuless
And in the odd semester, What will become ofRendezvous?
At that very moment I knew
it would be probably much better
If I was to drop this idea
and tear apart the ill fated letter,
And then as I sat within my cubicle
I felt an unending sense of doom
There was no other I knew here
I suddnenly noticed my empty room
There and then I felt
a feeling of intense gratitude
for the T&P section had made me
suffer JUST fifty days of solitude.
Friday, June 10, 2005
Murphy's Law and the Eternal Optimist
If you have read The Alchemist, you 1) would have loved it as a "wonderfully hope creating and opstimistic story." or 2) would have lambasted it terming it to "be hopelessly optimistic and away from life. " or 3) would have remained untouched by it. Read this piece, and you shall probably change your views about the book. If you havent read the Alchemist, read on anyway, and you might want to rush to the nearest book store to buy the book " that has influeced millions of lives." I have only read the book once and it seemed complete sham to me back then. Here was a guy who was actually selling dreams to people (Coelho), and whats more people were actually buying it, as a moralising book. I read it for the storyline, which was interesting.
However a lot of things have happened which have made me change my views about the theories in the book.
The entire book is based on the theory "When you want something badly, the entire universe conspires for you to get it." I always believed the opposite, namely Murphy's Law, which states that "wherever something can go wrong, it will." I still believe the Law, but now I also believe in the opstimistic theory in the Alchemist. Can it be possible, when everything goes wrong, that the Universe is actually helping you? I believe it is. When you want something too badly, you are ready to risk everything you have and go after what you want. And the Universe tries to test you throughout, trying to shake your conviction, trying to break you down, and trying to test you: Murphy's Law is a test that lets the Universe decide the motivated enough. And from there on, the Universe is ready to help you. You have to work for getting whatever you want, otherwise your "badly wanting it " is useless.
If the Universe wasnt helping, could Abraham Lincoln and APJ Abdul Kalam become the presidents of their respective countries? Could Lance Armstrong come back from a battle with cancer to win five Tour de France titles? And why does every movie have a good-triumphs over bad theme? Or why dont the bad forces outnumber the forces thats keeping the world in peace?
It is because the Universe has an order, an order thats made to help everyone.
You might contend this by pointing out, that for every Abe or APJ, there are millions who fail to make it. I know its true, but maybe thats because they werent motivated enough. And they didnt want to win that badly.
I believe that the Universe gives equal opportunities to eeryone, and the number of good things happening to a person is a constant for each person, as is the number of bad things. It just comes down how much can a person take of these opportunities, and not be dissuaded by the failures. And in the end, probably it all doesnt matter: success is defined by a person, so if you get what you aim for, you are successful. The Universe has helped you. If you arent, you just need to want that thing that much more. And work hard to get it as well. Atleast initially. And from there, let Universe take over. I am a pessemist, but deepdown. I believe everyone is an optimist. You just have to believe the Universe and work hard.
However a lot of things have happened which have made me change my views about the theories in the book.
The entire book is based on the theory "When you want something badly, the entire universe conspires for you to get it." I always believed the opposite, namely Murphy's Law, which states that "wherever something can go wrong, it will." I still believe the Law, but now I also believe in the opstimistic theory in the Alchemist. Can it be possible, when everything goes wrong, that the Universe is actually helping you? I believe it is. When you want something too badly, you are ready to risk everything you have and go after what you want. And the Universe tries to test you throughout, trying to shake your conviction, trying to break you down, and trying to test you: Murphy's Law is a test that lets the Universe decide the motivated enough. And from there on, the Universe is ready to help you. You have to work for getting whatever you want, otherwise your "badly wanting it " is useless.
If the Universe wasnt helping, could Abraham Lincoln and APJ Abdul Kalam become the presidents of their respective countries? Could Lance Armstrong come back from a battle with cancer to win five Tour de France titles? And why does every movie have a good-triumphs over bad theme? Or why dont the bad forces outnumber the forces thats keeping the world in peace?
It is because the Universe has an order, an order thats made to help everyone.
You might contend this by pointing out, that for every Abe or APJ, there are millions who fail to make it. I know its true, but maybe thats because they werent motivated enough. And they didnt want to win that badly.
I believe that the Universe gives equal opportunities to eeryone, and the number of good things happening to a person is a constant for each person, as is the number of bad things. It just comes down how much can a person take of these opportunities, and not be dissuaded by the failures. And in the end, probably it all doesnt matter: success is defined by a person, so if you get what you aim for, you are successful. The Universe has helped you. If you arent, you just need to want that thing that much more. And work hard to get it as well. Atleast initially. And from there, let Universe take over. I am a pessemist, but deepdown. I believe everyone is an optimist. You just have to believe the Universe and work hard.
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